Do You Believe in Creeps?
by Plainclothes cop
Summary: Sequel to "Let's Expand." Strange, scary things are happening at the Stewart house, and Miley is the only one who notices them. Meanwhile, as Hannah Montana, Hannah gets into some serious trouble with her career. The ending is VERY SHOCKING! Rated M for sexual content, not graphic violence.
1. Nightmare in Malibu

**In depth plot summary: Strange, scary things are happening at the Stewart house. Things that have no logical explanation, and Miley is the only one who notices them. She feels crazy, but Miley is put under the impression that her house is haunted. She also has countless nightmares. Meanwhile, as Hannah Montana, Hannah gets into some serious trouble with her career. She gets cornered by her fans, and then, just when it looks like all hope is lost, something _REALLY SHOCKING _happens!**

**Disclaimer: The document you are about to read is a parody. The writer of the document is not associated with Hannah Montana or Disney channel in any way. Little or none of the content of this fanfic is from any episode of the show. Also please note that none of the content of this fanfic reflects the opinions or views of any actual person portrayed herein. Anyway, IT'S JUST A FANTASY!**

**Chapter 1: "Nightmare in Malibu"**

One day, Miley was at school, in the hallway, and she was really giving this one guy the eye. Miley thought he was hot, and cool. Sounded kind of paradoxical, but people used these words as slang, and the definitions were very much alike. Miley did have a boyfriend, Oliver, and a girlfriend, Lily, but they all believed that love wasn't about being tied down to one person. Lily had already hooked up with three other guys (before she became a lesbian), and now Miley was hoping she could do the same.

His name was Marty, and Miley didn't really have the guts to go to him, she was hoping he would come to her. Unfortunately, Miley suddenly realized she _should _have gone to him. Because before too long, another girl walked up to him. It was the worst possible girl for Miley to lose him to: Amber! Miley opened her locker as she watched them talk. She couldn't make out the words they were saying, but Miley was getting so mad! Miley continued to gather her supplies as she watched Marty touch Amber's face. Miley was so shocked and offended by it that she accidentally slammed her locker door right on her hand! "OWWWWWWWWWWWW!" screamed Miley. "OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OWWWWWWWWWW!" She tried to pull her hand out, but she was stuck!

Miley couldn't believe what happened next. Miley had lost a lot of guys to both Amber and Ashley, but Miley was usually aware of them dating. To her knowledge, Amber and Marty hadn't gone out at all, so it seemed as though they just met. So, how do you explain what happened next? Simple, she couldn't!

Amber and Marty started to kiss. As they kissed, something even _more _illogical happened. The floor started to rumble and shake. By then, everyone else was cleared out of the halls. Several of the other lockers fell down! The plaster started breaking off the ceiling! Some of the light fixtures broke! Miley got the feeling those things weren't really happening, and that they were just symbolic for what she was feeling inside, but it all felt too real!

Finally, Amber and Marty's kiss parted and the rumbling and all the other destruction stopped. "You are so hot, Amber" said Marty.

"I know" said Amber in a cocky voice.

Miley tried to pull her hand out of her locker. "Uh...a little help?" said Miley pathetically. Marty and Amber looked at Miley and laughed. They each made the shape of the letter L with their hands and put them on their foreheads.

"Loser!" said Amber and Marty at the same time. With that, they walked away holding hands. Miley shrugged helplessly with an emotional facial expression.

Just when Miley thought things couldn't get any worse, another illogical thing happened. She heard a deep growling noise. Miley gasped in fear. She heard the sound of slow, loud footsteps. There was another deep growl. Miley shook in fear, then looked in the direction of the sounds. Approaching the other doorway, there was a shadow. A shadow that revealed a large, open mouth, and sharp teeth! Miley tried to turn her locker knob to do the combination, but she was just too scared to pay attention to what she was doing. Then, right in front of the doorway, there was what looked like a _MONSTER _with a bizarre anatomy! It had red skin, it was about the size of a lion, it's body was shaped like a turtle, and there were four legs with claws. The monster had a long, brontosaurus like neck, and the only thing on the tip of the neck was a mouth with sharp fangs!

Miley screamed and tried to unlock her locker again. The monster edged closer to her, slowly. Miley was really starting to sweat with fear. The monster stopped briefly and roared at her. Miley still couldn't get her locker open! The monster then got way too close to her and Miley screamed her lungs out! It opened it's mouth and inched it's jaws right towards Miley!

Suddenly, one second Miley was at school, the next she was at home, in bed, at night. What a horrible nightmare! Miley didn't know which was worse; the monster, or losing the guy she liked to Amber! With the way Miley had kept losing guys to Amber and Ashley in real life, this nightmare probably showed she was really letting that get to her. Miley looked across the room. She looked at her digital clock. It was 3:45 in the morning. Miley trembled in fear as she looked at her clock. Even though she knew it was just a clock, from her point of view, it looked like two red eyes glowing in the dark. If they were, she almost thought they blinked a couple of times. Miley hid under her bed sheets.

Miley tried to get back to sleep, but then, something even worse than her nightmare happened. She heard something. Something unusual. It was a voice. "_Miley..."_ said the voice. Miley gasped, and took her head out from under the bed sheets. She looked around her room, knowing it was completely illogical to find someone in there at this hour (not to mention, a stranger). No one. The room was empty. Did she really hear a voice? Miley tried to go back to sleep again. But she heard the voice again. "_Miley," _said the voice. "_Are you there?"_ It was a woman's voice. Scary, yet strangely familiar. "_Miley," _said the voice. "_Can you hear me?"_ It seemed to be coming from the distance, but it was loud enough for Miley to hear it, and it sounded like whispering with a slight echo. Miley got so scared that tears started to form in her eyes. "_Miley!"_ called the voice. Damn, this voice sounded as scary as Miss Kunckle!

The next night, at a Hannah Montana concert, Hannah was singing "He could be the one." During the song, one of her older man dancers posed as the person Hannah was supposedly singing about. He strutted, winked at Hannah, pretended to play a guitar, blew Hannah a kiss, gave her a flower, and even danced with her a bit.

Hannah sang.

"_Smooth talkin'_

_So rockin'_

_He's got everything that a girl's wantin'_

_Guitar cutie_

_He plays it groovy_

_And I can't keep myself from doin' somethin' stupid_

_Think I'm really fallin' for his mind_

_Get butterflies when he says my name_

_He's got somethin' special_

_He's got somethin' special_

_And when he's lookin' at me I wanna' get all sentimental_

_He's got somethin' special_

_He's got somethin' special_

_I can hardly breathe, somethin' tellin' me _

_Tellin' me maybe he could be the one_

_He could be the one_

_He could be the one_

_He could be the o-uh-uh-uh-ne_

_He could be the one_

_He could be the one_

_He could be the o-uh-uh-uh-ne"_

After the concert, Hannah and Lola decided to conceal themselves by changing into their "true forms" at the stadium. That way, they could get out of there undetected. Miley and Lily exited their dressing room through a secret passage, so that way no one would see them exit Hannah Montana's dressing room as Miley and Lily. "Ok, Lily," said Miley. "We're in our true forms, but we must run silent. We don't want anyone to get suspicious."

Miley and Lily tiptoed down the hall. They started to walk by a paparazzi talking to a nearby patron. "I managed to track her down once two years ago," said the paparazzi. "But I'm tellin' ya', afta' every concert, Hannah Montana just disappears! And I can't find her anywhere else!"

"Well, come on," said the patron. "She's gotta' be out there somewhere."

"Da' kid is a freakin' ghost!" said the paparazzi. At the mention of the word "ghost", Miley suddenly stopped in her tracks and froze with fear.

"That's nonsense!" said the patron. There was a two second pause, then the patron said with a smile "Everybody knows ghosts can't be photographed!"

Lily noticed Miley wasn't by her side, then she looked back at Miley. "Come on!" whispered Lily as she gestured for Miley to follow her.

Before Miley could take more than three steps, the patron said to them "Hey! What are you kids doing?"

Miley and Lily stopped and looked at them. "Uh..." said Miley. "We...were just...looking for Hannah Montana!"

"_Good luck!_" said the paparazzi sarcastically. "Even _I _can't find her! And I'm a paparazzi!"

"Oh," said Miley. "Well...good luck to you too!" With that, Miley and Lily ran away.

After Miley and Lily rounded a corner, they made it out the back door of the stadium. "Woo!" said Lily wiping her forehead in excitement. "That was close, wasn't it?" They both stopped walking. Miley was looking straight ahead with a fearful expression. She was still thinking about how the paparazzi thought Hannah was a ghost. It wasn't that that bothered her, it was just the word "ghost" in general. What did that remind her of? The voice. "Miley?" said Lily. Lily's tone changed when she saw the frightened expression on Miley's face. "Miley, are you ok?" said Lily in a dramatic, concerned voice.

Miley shook her nerves out. "Uh, yeah, I'm fine" lied Miley. Miley and Lily held hands and walked over to Miley's car.

The next day, after school, Miley and Lily were watching T.V. at Miley's house. They were watching MTV. On the T.V., there was a white, young guy rapper singing a song that Miley and Lily found very offensive. He was known as "K Rap Rodriguez." It was the first time they had seen this music video, or ever even heard of this artist, so they actually listened to the whole song. "What a pric!" yelled Miley. "I may not know what it's like to be a guy, but K Rap Rodriguez is like a male incarnation of Amber and Ashley!"

"Yeah," said Lily. "Only Amber and Ashley are better looking."

Miley closed in on Lily. "_Hello!"_ said Miley. "Back to earth, captain clit suck!" There was a three second pause. "He sings about picking on people just because he doesn't like the way they look, or because they're different!" said Miley. "Honestly, I don't like the way Drew Oman looks...or the way he smells, for that matter," said Miley waving her hand in front of her with a disgusted look. "But I don't pick on him!"

"Yeah!" said Lily. "And you and I aren't exactly the most popular girls in the school, but in reality, we're really not much different from everybody else! We like clothes! We like shoes! We like...pedicures!" said Lily lifting her bare foot and wiggling her toes. "We like chick flicks!" said Lily.

"Of course, Lily," said Miley. "And if a person is into video games, RPG's, and science fiction/fantasy stuff, I'm sure that deep down, there will always be a part of them...a very passionate side of them, that wants to be just like everybody else!" If Miley's life were a T.V. show, she was sure she and Lily would receive a round of applause right now.

Lily suddenly stared off into space and squeaked blissfully "EE! EE!"

"What are you 'EE'-ing about?" asked Miley.

"'Captain clit suck'!" said Lily humorously. "I like it!" Miley laughed, then they both started to make out. They made out for about 15 seconds, then Robbie Ray came in through the front door. Miley and Lily broke off their kiss and looked at Robbie Ray.

"Well, I'll be damned!" said Robbie Ray with a smile. "It's amazin' when BFF's become GF's!" There was a brief pause. "Say!" said Robbie Ray. "Maybe I should write a song about that!"

"Uh, daddy," said Miley with a smile. "That's not really something I want to advertise."

"Hey, it _sells!"_ said Lily.

Miley smiled at Robbie Ray. "Go for it, cowboy!"

Robbie Ray then started singing.

"_When BFF's become GF's,_

_Their hearts are filled with glee_

_Then everyone starts gawkin' at them_

_It's such an incredible sight to see!_

_A good sight to seeeee!_

_A hot sight to seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!_"

Miley and Lily applauded Robbie Ray. "Wow!" said Lily to Miley. "Your dad is getting dirtier by the decade!"

That night, Miley had just gotten back from a date with Lily and Oliver. They had sex at Miley's house, and now Lily and Oliver were just on their way out. Lily and Oliver were dressed while Miley was in her robe, barefoot. Miley was kissing Oliver. "Bye, boyfriend!" said Miley as her last kiss with Oliver parted. Miley then kissed Lily for the same period of time that she kissed Oliver. "Bye, girlfriend!" said Miley as her last kiss with Lily parted.

Oliver looked at Lily. "Ok, Lily," said Oliver. "On three..." Oliver then counted to three on his fingers. On the count of three, Lily and Oliver both said to Miley at the same time "Parting is such sweet sorrow."

"Awww!" said Miley as they all waved goodbye. Lily and Oliver had exited the front door. Miley plopped onto the couch, tired, but happy. She sat there for a while, as the room was only partially lit. She turned on the T.V. On the T.V., she saw the movie "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre." Miley made a frightened expression, then shook her forehead with a disgusted look, and turned the T.V. off. Miley decided she was in the mood for some toast. She got up, and put some toast in the toaster. Miley then found herself looking at her dad's collection of books on the mini bookshelf. The first book she noticed was on there was Steven King's "The Stand." Miley had never read a Steven King book, but she heard that he was a very spooky writer. So the fact that that was the first book she noticed, that kind of scared her. Miley walked around the room a bit. She then saw that one of their house plants was really decaying. Why hadn't Robbie Ray watered it? Had he? Was the plant just really old? Needless to say, the dead plant made Miley feel the presence of death around her. She sat back down on the couch. In the distance, she heard one of her neighbor's dogs howl. It was one hell of a howl, because it sounded like a creepy wolf howl! Miley couldn't believe this. She had just had a really fun night with Lily and Oliver, and now she was starting to get scared again.

Suddenly, Miley heard a loud noise! A noise that seemed to be coming from inside the house! She gasped. Miley looked in the direction of the noise, and saw that her toast in the toaster had popped. "Oh, pfft!" said Miley smacking her forehead in disgust. "Duh!" Miley went into the kitchen, took her toast out of the toaster, and put some butter and cinnamon on it.

Miley spent three minutes eating the toast. Suddenly, she heard a loud noise that didn't have any logic behind it. She heard the toilet in the downstairs bathroom flush. There wasn't anybody else downstairs! Who flushed it? Miley got up with a frightened expression and went into the downstairs bathroom. No one was there. The toilet was flowing from the flush. Miley started hyperventilating. She started to sweat with fear just like she did the night she had her last nightmare.

Miley walked out of the bathroom and back into the living room, still hyperventilating. Much like the mysterious voice she heard before, this had no logical explanation. It's like the toilet just flushed all by itself! Or did it? Could the toilet have been malfunctioning somehow? Maybe. She had never heard the toilet flush by itself before, but she had heard it flow by itself. She had to tell her dad. Her dad was in bed at the moment, so she decided to write him a note. She got a pad of paper and pencil, and started writing it on an end table with a lamp on it. Unfortunately, she was so scared that she was clumsy in the writing process. She accidentally dropped the pencil between the end table and the wall. With the lamp on the end table turned on, Miley looked in the space between for the pencil. She could see it, then as she reached for it, she saw a loose plug. Miley stopped and froze with fear. The lamp wasn't plugged in! This was even more illogical! She got up off the floor and stared at the lamp long and hard. Miley slowly reached towards the lamp, under the shade, and touched the bulb. The lamp then flickered and completely went out! Miley let out a quiet, brief scream.

Miley turned around towards the stairs, about to run up to her room and hide under her bed sheets, then suddenly, A DARK FIGURE MOVED TOWARDS HER! Miley screamed longer and louder this time. The dark figure screamed with her. Miley turned on the lights and saw that it was Jackson, who appeared to be just coming in through the front door. "What's wrong, Miley?" said Jackson loudly. "It's me, your dear brother!" said Jackson sweetly. Miley screamed again. "Ha ha, very funny!" said Jackson sarcastically.

Miley thought by now, Robbie Ray would come downstairs swinging his light up raccoon, but he didn't. He must have slept through it. "What are you doing out so late?" asked Miley accusingly. Miley wondered if Jackson had been out drinking under age, but that was impossible, because his breath didn't smell like beer.

"Hangin' with mah' friends!" said Jackson in a cocky voice. "And let's face it, dad trusts me more than he trusts you. Because you're the baby in the family." Jackson said his last sentence in baby talk as he pinched Miley's cheek.

"I should've known it was you" said Miley. "I can smell your armpits from 20 miles away."

"Say! Thanks, Miles!" said Jackson sincerely.

Miley was puzzled. "Ok, I'm lost" said Miley. "I diss you and you're happy?"

"You said you could smell mah' armpits from 20 miles away!" said Jackson.

"So?" said Miley.

"But when you were six," stated Jackson. "You said you could smell me from _50 _miles away!" There was a brief pause. "That's the nicest thing you've said about me all week!" Miley rolled her eyes.

Later, everyone went to bed. Miley had a lot of trouble getting to sleep that night. She kept imagining scary things coming after her in the dark. She was starting to wish Oliver and Lily had been able to spend the night with her. She would have given anything to have them sleeping right by her side, holding her in their arms. Miley eventually got to sleep, but then she had another nightmare. She dreamed Oliver and Lily _had _spent the night. In her dream, she woke up in the middle of the night, and she put her arms around Lily and Oliver only to discover they were nothing but _skeletons!_ Miley woke up and gasped. She was so scared she had a really dry throat. She sat up, and took a drink of a glass of water she had on her nightstand. She looked around the room. Nothing scary. Miley layed back down. She tried to get back to sleep for 20 minutes, then...the horror continued. Miley started to hear that voice again. "_Miley..."_ said the voice. Miley gasped, sat up, and looked around the room again. Nothing, of course. She layed back down and hid under the sheets. She started to quiver. _"Miley," _said the voice again. "_You're in danger."_

Whoa, Miley didn't like the sound of that. Whoever, or _whatever _the voice was, that sounded particularly threatening. "You're in danger"? Now that was scary! "_Miley," _said the voice. _"You have to be ready."_

Ready? _For what?_ What was this voice talking about? Terror tears started to form in Miley's eyes. This was all just too much. Miley wished there was a logical explanation for all this, but there wasn't! There was only one thought that was in Miley's head right now: **Ghosts.**

Miley got back to sleep later, and this time, she didn't have a nightmare. When she woke up, it was eight o' clock in the morning. The sun had just barely risen over the horizon. It was Saturday. Miley knew Jackson would still be in bed, but she wasn't sure about Robbie Ray. Needless to say, Miley was afraid to get up yet. Right now, she didn't want to walk around the house in the dark. Oh sure, she _could_ turn the lights on, but the contrast in light between inside and outside was still enough to make her uncomfortable. Miley had seen a lot of horror movies, and she never understood why people inside their houses would leave the lights off. Just because it was a horror movie? Please! It didn't make sense!

Miley would like to have someone to talk to, if only to get rid of the lonely, frightening feeling. Even after having sex with Lily and Oliver, the unexplained occurrences made her feel like she was a bachelor with no lovers or friends at all. Miley thought about talking to her dad about this, after all, Robbie Ray was the most understanding person she knew, and he was always the one who cared the most. But then she started to have second thoughts. For one thing, she was afraid Jackson might hear it. If he did, Miley knew he would start making fun of her. He may even start to play a few mean, scary jokes on her. It was bad enough she was dealing with...the real thing. Wait a minute, _the real thing? _Did Miley really think that? Was she insane? Oh no, this was bad. Was Miley actually starting to believe in ghosts? Just about anyone she told this to would think she's crazy! Hell, even _she _thought she was crazy! That was another thing; Miley believed in ghosts, monsters, the boogey man, and vampires and whatnot when she was a little kid, and her dad had to "chase the monsters out from under her bed." If she told her dad she believed in ghosts, he probably wouldn't take her seriously, and he would start molly codling her. Robbie Ray had already done enough of that in Miley's teen years. She'd be lucky to ever sleep with Oliver and Lily again!

Miley decided to wait until it started to get brighter, possibly listen for Robbie Ray to get up. There was only one problem. She was starting to get hungry. She really had to have some breakfast. All this fear was making her hungry. So, as much as it scared her, she got out of bed, exited her room, and walked barefoot down the partially dark stairs. When she reached to bottom of the stairs, Miley looked around the room, looking for anything out of the ordinary. So far, everything looked normal. Miley turned on every light in the downstairs area. She started snacking on little food. Before making her real breakfast, Miley approached the stove to make some coffee. When she looked at the tea kettle, she noticed there was a little bit of steam coming out of it. Miley was puzzled. She felt the tea kettle, and OUCH! It was hot! Miley's eyes widened and her jaw dropped with fear. The water was already hot!

Miley went back upstairs. She peeked into Jackson's room. Jackson was still fast asleep. Miley made the same terrified expression she made downstairs. She walked across the hall and looked in Robbie Ray's room. He was still fast asleep. Miley made the same expression again without making a sound. Miley stood in the middle of the hall, silently panicking, looking back and forth, chewing on her nails. If Robbie Ray and Jackson were still in bed, _who heated up the water?_

A little more than an hour later, the sun came up, and Robbie Ray was downstairs, eating breakfast at the table with Miley. Miley had already finished her breakfast, but she wanted to talk to Robbie Ray. "You wouldn't believe what Jackson did last night, daddy" said Miley.

"Oh no," said Robbie Ray. "He didn't eat my pie, did he?"

"Worse," said Miley. "He came back from his late night outing, walked in through the front door without making a sound, came towards me in the dark, and scared the hell out of me."

"Sweet mercy," said Robbie Ray. "If he came in without makin' a sound, he must be tryin' to get away with somethin'."

"Good god! I thought he was a burglar!" lied Miley. The truth was, Miley thought he was a _ghost._ "He made me scream bloody murder!"

"Wait a minute," said Robbie Ray feeling concerned. "You screamed and I didn't hear it?"

"'Fraid so, daddy," said Miley. "I don't know how you slept through it."

"Oh no," said Robbie Ray sadly. Robbie Ray got up from his seat. Miley knew he was about to hug her, and Miley really could have used some comfort, so she got up too. They hugged. "Livin' in a city like this," stated Robbie Ray. "If I can't hear mah' baby girl scream, Idunno' how I would rescue you." Normally, Miley would get mad at her dad for calling her his "baby girl", because the word "baby" was an implication that she was one. But that was exactly how Miley felt right now. Believing in ghosts, she really did feel like a "baby." The hug lasted a while, then Robbie Ray parted it, but Miley still held on. "It's OK, bud," said Robbie Ray. "You did your part, you don't need ta' hug yer' daddy any more'n that."

"Yes, I do" said Miley half tearful.

"Awww..." said Robbie Ray as he re-embraced Miley. "Wow, somethin' musta' really gotten inta' _you_."

"You have no idea" said Miley still half tearful. Robbie Ray started to get a little worried. Miley was obviously feeling bad about something, but she didn't say anything about it. Robbie Ray thought that maybe it was something she didn't want him to know. With the way he had been respecting Miley's privacy and giving her more freedom, and not being so overprotective of her, he decided not to ask. But Robbie Ray couldn't help but wonder if maybe...she was trying to send him a hidden message.

Later that day, Miley was on the beach with Lily. After the nightmare Miley had the night before, it was comforting to see Lily alive and in full flesh. They were sitting at a picnic table, and Lily was telling Miley about something that happened earlier that week that she was really exited about, which she forgot to tell Miley before. "I was like 'give me the ball, Joanie!'" said Lily. "Joanie was like 'if you want the ball, come and get it!' So then I start wrestling her for the ball, all of a sudden she starts giggling, and before I knew it, we were horse playing in our bare feet! She eventually tackled me into the sand, pinning me right on my back, pretty much laying on top of me, I was really laughing, then Joanie says 'you're really fun to play with, Lily', and she _winks _at me! Yeeeeeeep!"

Miley's reaction was very weak. She just smiled and said "That's very romantic, Lily."

Lily looked back at Miley with uncertainty. "Miley, are you OK?" asked Lily. "You don't sound very exited."

Miley was afraid to tell virtually anyone about her "haunted house", and she was afraid to even tell her dad. But Miley decided she had to tell _someone._ Lily was the next person she trusted as much as her dad. "Actually, Lily," Miley stated. "There's been something really uncomfortable on my mind lately. I really enjoy being with you and Oliver, but there's something that's been making me feel like a child, and like I'm all alone."

Lily made a concerned expression. "What's wrong, Miley?" asked Lily as she put her hands on either side of Miley's face.

Miley hesitated. "I'm afraid you wouldn't believe me if I told you" said Miley.

Lily gave Miley a kiss. "Try me" said Lily gently after the kiss parted. Miley took a deep breath, and began. She told Lily about all of the illogical, horrifying things that had been happening at her house. She also told her about her nightmares. It took her about ten minutes. Lily didn't interrupt her at all. By the time Miley had finished explaining, Lily wasn't touching Miley anymore. "Miley," said Lily. "Do you...hear yourself?" Miley buried her face in her hands. She knew Lily wouldn't believe her. "You say you've been having a lot of nightmares," said Lily. "And those other things were probably all just nightmares too! That's it, for the next six months, when we go to the movies, _no more horror movies!_"

"Lily!" said Miley half tearful. "You're my BFF and GF! I thought you said you'd always understand me!"

"Yeah! But I never thought you'd be believing in ghosts!" said Lily.

Just then, Oliver arrived on the beach. He walked up to Miley and Lily. "Hey there, kitty cats!" flirted Oliver. "Your dog is here!" Oliver pretended to bark like a dog, then gave Miley a flirty wolf howl. Miley screamed and shielded her eyes. Oliver was puzzled. "Gee, was my wolf howl really that bad?" said Oliver.

"Oliver, you're not going to believe this!" said Lily in a humorous, ridiculing voice. "Miley thinks her house is haunted!"

"_Haunted?"_ said Oliver. Lily nodded. "You mean like...with ghosts?" said Oliver.

"Yeah!" said Lily still ridiculing. "She keeps telling me stuff about having nightmares, hearing voices, and other things happening in her house that have no logical explanation!"

Oliver looked at Miley briefly. "Miley," said Oliver. "You mean to tell me you actually believe in such gibberish?"

"_Yeeeeeeees!"_ said Miley in a panicky, tearful voice.

Oliver gave Miley a ridiculing look for a few seconds, but then he opened his arms and said sweetly "THAT IS SO CUTE!" With that, Oliver hugged Miley tightly. Miley returned the embrace, savoring the comfort Oliver was giving her. When Oliver broke off the hug, he still had his arms around Miley. "You know, Miley," he said. "I can relate. It's not uncommon that late at night, when everyone else is asleep, my imagination gets the best of me, and, I start to think about horror. When the lights are down, and the shadows are at large, I start to imagine all kinds of scary things jumping out at me in the dark!" Miley really appreciated these things Oliver was telling her. "And let me tell you," Oliver continued. "I've always wanted a sensitive girl. There's this one T.V. show, 'Kathy's Life', starring a young girl, and in one episode, she was going through something similar to what you're going through! She was afraid of the dark, she was afraid of thunder and lightning, and she believed in the undead! Just like a little kid! It was _adorable!_" Oliver gave Miley a kiss on each cheek, hugged her, and ran his hands along her back as Miley held onto Oliver tightly. "Don't worry, Miley muffin," said Oliver in baby talk. "I'm not gonna' let no ghosts get you!"

"Well," said Miley half tearfully during the last hug. "At least _somebody's _giving me emotional support!" said Miley as she angrily looked at Lily. Oliver and Miley still had their arms around each other when the hug parted. "So..." said Miley. "You believe me?"

Oliver hesitated. "Uhhhh, hummm..." said Oliver. There was a brief pause. "Tough question" said Oliver sheepishly.

Miley pushed Oliver away. "How can I do anything about this if my own friends won't believe me?"

"Oh please, you're fine, Miley," said Lily. "There are no such things as ghosts."

"Well," stated Oliver. "If it's really bothering you, why don't you talk to your dad?"

"If I tell my dad," said Miley. "He'll treat me like a kid until _my _kids have kids!"

Oliver patted Miley on the shoulder and smiled. "He won't live that long" assured Oliver jokingly.

"Miley," said Lily. "You said you've been having nightmares, and I'm telling you, those illogical things that happened in your house were dreams too!"

"Lily," said Miley. "When you're dreaming, you can't always tell if it's real. But I think I can tell when I'm awake!"

"I don't know," said Lily doubtfully. "Sometimes I think _I'm_ dreaming when _I'm _awake. I mean, how do you know _this _isn't a dream?"

Suddenly, Lily gave Miley a wide eyed glare as she vibrated her head. Miley was starting to get very uncomfortable, just like she had been at home. "Lily," said Miley on the verge of fright. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"_**I'm not Lily!**"_ said Lily in a monstrous voice.

Miley screamed, got up, and she started to run away, but Oliver grabbed her arm. "Miley! Miley! Please!" said Oliver. "She's just messing with you."

Miley breathed a dire sigh of relief and sat back down. There was a moment of silence. "Miley," said Oliver. "Tell me about these unexplained events at your house."

"I was the only person downstairs and the toilet flushed all by itself!" said Miley.

"Well," said Oliver. "Then maybe there's something wrong with the system. You may need to call a plumber."

"That lamp on the end table was turned on," said Miley. "And I discovered a loose plug behind it! It wasn't plugged in!"

"Are you sure the loose plug wasn't for that one automatic light timer hooked up to the big lamp?" said Oliver.

"No, but-..." said Miley followed by a scoff. "The water in the tea kettle, on the stove, was already hot when my daddy and Jackson hadn't even gotten up yet!"

"Well," said Oliver. "Maybe one of them got up only to realize they were still tired and went back to bed!"

Miley squinted her eyes and clenched her teeth briefly. "And to top it all off," said Miley. "I heard a woman's voice calling out my name and trying to send me messages while I was in bed! _Twice!"_

Oliver's eyes suddenly widened in fear. He looked to the side and scratched his head briefly. Oliver looked back at Miley. "Gee, well, now _that I can't explain!"_ said Oliver.

Miley turned in her seat so that her sides were facing Lily and Oliver. She had look of defeat. Lily kissed Miley on the cheek. "What was that for?" asked Miley.

There was a two second pause, then Lily said "Just because you believe in ghosts doesn't mean I don't love you anymore." Miley made a happy, timid smile.

"OK, Lily," said Oliver. "On three..." Oliver counted to three on his fingers, then Oliver and Lily both gave Miley a kiss on either cheek at the same time, each with an intimate, verbal noise. Miley giggled.

"Tell you what, Miley," said Lily. "Whether these 'ghosts' are real or not, if it makes you feel any better, I'll come with you to Traci's party tonight. I'll try to be nice to her, and maybe it'll help you take your mind off all this."

"I'll come too" said Oliver.

Miley made a much brighter smile, then put her arms around Lily and Oliver and said "I love you guys!"

That night, Hannah Montana, Lola Luftnangle, and Mike Stan Lee III went to a celebrity party. It was a party held by Traci Vanhorn, Hannah's celebrity friend. Hannah and Lola wore some very sexy outfits. They were wearing skimpy tops showing cleavage. They had entered the foyer. "I'm telling you, Hannah," said Lola. "All you need to feel better is to feel a lot of life around you. You're a celebrity, for God's sake! Celebrities get to go to the most pleasant places imaginable!"

"Yeah," said Mike. "Try not to think about all that death waiting for you at home."

Hannah looked at Mike angrily. "You _had _to plant that in my head!" Mike quickly embraced Hannah and kissed her. "Ok, all better" said Hannah with a smile.

They entered the room where the party was, and WOW! It looked amazing! There were tropical decorations all over the place! There were a couple of big, plastic sea horses. There was a big, stuffed, blue gorilla wearing sunglasses, standing in between two palm trees, smiling and giving a thumbs up signal. There were several fish tanks with fish and a few exotic sea creatures! There was a 6 foot tall plastic flamingo wearing sunglasses, on skates, holding a boom box. There was a life size elephant sculpture, palm trees all over the place, and there were two bubble blowing machines! It was beautiful! "WOA!" shouted Lola. "This is so cool!"

"Gee," said Hannah. "It's nice being a celebrity."

Just then, Traci came up to Hannah. "Hannah!" greeted Traci. Traci and Hannah gave each other a kiss on each cheek. "Mike!" greeted Traci turning to Mike. Traci and Mike gave each other a kiss on each cheek. "Lola!" greeted Traci to Lola. Traci kissed one of Lola's cheeks, Lola didn't kiss her back, then Traci stopped herself before delivering the second kiss. Lola gave Traci a shocked, disgusted look.

"_Traci?"_ said Lola.

"Oops," said Traci embarrassed. "Sorry, I was...on a roll."

"Traci," said Hannah. "This place looks awesome!"

"It does!" said Traci. "And Hannah, you're never going to believe who's here!"

"Who?" said Hannah exited.

"Gary Rithgow, from 'Let's Hang Out'!"

"_Ah!"_ exclaimed Hannah in a high pitched tone. "I am a huge fan of that show! I can't wait to meet him!" Traci suddenly covered her ears with an annoyed expression. Hannah was puzzled. Hannah pulled one of Traci's hands off her ear. "Why are you covering your ears?" asked Hannah.

Traci uncovered her ears. "Because this is the part where Lola usually starts screaming like an idiot" said Traci.

Lola looked at Traci offendedly. Lola said "Well, gee, when's the part when _you_-..."

"_You promissed you'd be nice to her!"_ whispered Mike to Lola.

Mike was right. Lola _did _promise Hannah she would be nice to Traci. All to make sure Hannah had a good enough time to make up for all the terror she had been going through at home. Lola had to do this, for Hannah. Lola took a deep breath. "Uh, yeah!" said Lola with a forced smile. "I do get really exited over famous people. Who wouldn't? EE!"

"Yes," said Traci. "And you'll have to loose that blissful squeaking before a star puts out a restraining order against you, _blue hair!_"

Lola closed in on Hannah. "The things I do for you" complained Lola.

Later, Hannah was separated from Lola and Mike, and she was with Traci. Hannah noticed a little display in the room they were in. It was a big pile of pillows with a sign that said "Pillow Mound." Hannah wondered what it was for. "Pillow mound?" said Hannah. "What's this for?"

Traci smiled. "Move a little closer to it and I'll show you" said Traci. Hannah did as directed, and Traci pushed Hannah right onto the pillows! Next, Traci kneeled onto the pillows next to Hannah, picked up one of the pillows, and started hitting Hannah with it as she and Hannah giggled. Hannah picked up her own pillow and started hitting Traci with it. They played for a while as a bunch of guys started to gawk at them (and a few girls). The onlookers cheered them on and laughed. Of course, Hannah and Traci knew they weren't laughing as a sign of dominance, they were laughing because it drove them crazy, filling their hearts with bliss. Hannah and Traci jumped on each other a few times as they whacked each other. In the process, Hannah and Traci's sandals came off, and they were doing it barefoot as there boobs bounced! The gawkers loved this! One time, Traci hit Hannah hard enough to make her fall on her back, Hannah kicked in the air, and ended up sticking her feet in Traci's face!

"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" the gawkers cheered. They loved Hannah and Traci's giggling too!

Hannah and Traci paused to catch their breath briefly. "Hey, Traci," said Hannah. "Are you wearing anything under that shirt?"

Traci was intimidated, but goofy. "No...why?" said Traci with a nervous, goofy grin. There was a two second pause, then Hannah lunged at Traci and started trying to pull off her luxurious shirt! "Oh no-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!" said Traci with laughter as she struggled with Hannah.

Hannah loved Traci, but still not the same way she loved Lola and Mike. After all, she knew them as more than just Lola and Mike, she knew them as Lily and Oliver.

Meanwhile, Lola and Mike were together. They were both sipping some punch when Mike suddenly dropped his cup, looked straight ahead, and exclaimed "OOOOHHHHH!"

"What are you 'OOOHHH'-ing about?" said Lola loudly.

"BRIDGET MENDLER!" shouted Mike exited.

Lola looked where Mike was looking, and sure enough, there was Lemonade Mouth's BRIDGET MENDLER! "AAAGGGGGHHHH!" Lola screamed with joy.

Lola and Mike both ran up to Bridget Mendler in the form of a flying hug. They both grabbed onto either side of her. Bridget giggled as they did this. Suddenly, Mike pulled Bridget towards him. "Hey! She's mine!" said Mike to Lola. "I saw her first!"

"But _I screamed _at her first!" said Lola pulling Bridget towards her.

"You did not!" said Mike pulling Bridget towards him.

"Whoa! Whoa!" shouted Bridget. "Boys! Boys! Bo-..." Before Bridget could say the word a third time, she looked at Lola and hesitated. "Wow," said Bridget. "This is unusual." There was a brief pause. "Anyway, people! People!" said Bridget cheerfully. "Stop playing tug-o-war! There's plenty of me to go around for _both _of you!" Bridget put her arms around Mike and Lola.

Later, there was a big crowd watching a few friends of celebrities dance on a stage. There was music playing. They went on for a while, then they left the stage, and it was time for Bridget Mendler to dance! Everyone cheered so much louder when Bridget came on stage. Her dancing was very charming. Before too long, Bridget made her finale move, and everyone cheered. Bridget looked down into the audience. "Hey, Mike! Lola!" called Bridget. "Come on up here!"

"AGH!" screamed Lola happily. "What a party!"

Lola got on stage, but Mike stayed put. "Come on, Mike!" called Bridget.

"Oh, no no no no," said Mike nervously. "Honestly, I can't dance."

"I love you, Mike!" flirted Bridget with a giving gesture. Mike gasped happily, then got up on stage in an instant. Bridget, Lola, and Mike started dancing in the form of a threesome. Mike had his arms around Bridget's back, and Bridget had her arms around Mike's neck. At the same time, Lola had _her _ arms around _Bridget's _neck, from behind her. Before too long, Mike made a move. He stopped dancing, and Bridget stopped dancing as well, then they both shared a long kiss! Lola, who kind of felt left out, forcibly turned Bridget around. Lola put one arm around Bridget's back, and the other on top of her head. She looked at Bridget sternly, then gave her an aggressive dip kiss! Lola was all over her! Bridget was so overwhelmed that she looked as if she was struggling to get loose! The crowd cheered. When the kiss parted, Bridget was sweating as she panted and fanned her mouth. Of course, she did smile afterwords. "You know, for a girl, you're a pretty good kisser!" said Bridget to Lola.

"EE! EE!" squeaked Lola blissfully. _Damn, _thought Lola. _Why can't the real world be like this?_ Next, Hannah and Gary Rithgow came and danced on stage! The crowd cheered more. Hannah and Gary danced. At one point, they did a rather provocative dance move. They moved as if they were having anal sex! The crowd cheered. After that, Gary lifted Hannah up as Hannah hooked her legs around Gary's waist. Gary started bobbing Hannah up and down repeatedly. As they did this move, Bridget was smacking Hannah's ass every time she came down!

When Gary put Hannah down, Hannah did a little solo dancing. The audience was really impressed! "Allison Stoner, eat your heart out!" yelled Hannah.

Just then, there was a voice on a microphone. "OK," said the voice. "Everyone move away from Hannah briefly!" Hannah, who seemed to be expecting this, smiled and pushed her chest out to the audience with her arms behind her. In the middle of the audience, there was a man with a hose! The man squirted Hannah with the hose, making her boobs dripping wet! The crowd cheered. Hannah then did some dancing that caused her wet boobs to bounce. The audience loved this!

Eventually, the guys in the audience started chanting "TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF!"

Hannah stopped dancing and laughed nervously. "Uh," said Hannah. "I _would _take it off, except if I do that, a lot of people in the media are going to be saying mean, nasty things about me."

"BOOOOOO!" said the crowd.

"Which are mainly a bunch of bitchy ladies who don't believe in being sexy!" said Hannah.

Then, to Hannah's surprise, the _girls _started chanting "TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF!"

Hannah smiled at the audience. "Wellllll!" said Hannah pleasantly. "Looks like we have a lot more sexy girls than I thought we did!" The audience cheered. Hannah started to do some provocative dancing. Then, she put her hand behind her back, unhooked her top, and COMEPLETELY REMOVED IT! The crowd went wild! Hannah danced so that her bare, dripping wet boobs were bouncing all over the place! She did this for about three minutes, then Gary Rithgow came up to her and started kissing her while squeezing her boobs! Then Gary started sucking her niples! "Woooooooooooooooooo!" cheered Hannah along with the crowd. Now _this _was living! Hannah figured this was what her song "This is the Life" meant. This was one awesome night! Hannah loved the attention! Not once during this party did ghosts or any other supernatural creatures pop into her head.

Suddenly, this wild party was brought to an end. A young guy with a microphone and a cell phone barged onto the stage and yelled "OK, OK, cut the music! Cut the music! Everybody freeze!"

The music stopped. "BOOOOOOO!" said the crowd.

"No no no, listen!" said the guy. "I got something to say!" There was a brief pause. The guy looked on his cell phone and said "An insider says...Hannah Montana had sex with K Rap Rodriguez!" Everyone else in the room gasped! Hannah, who was outraged at this announcement, quickly put her top back on. "Hannah was seen exiting a hotel room," said the messenger. "With K Rap Rodriguez, holding hands, and kissing!"

"OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!" the audience exclaimed in shock.

"Hannah, you slut!" yelled one of the guys in the audience.

"Hannah, you're a mean girl!" yelled another guy.

"I honestly thought you were better than that, Hannah!" yelled a girl.

"_Why _Hannah?" said another girl. "_Why?"_

"Gimmie' that mic!" said Hannah as she snatched the microphone out of the messenger's hand. "I did not have sex with K Rap Rodriguez!" yelled Hannah angrily. "I wouldn't have sex with that jerkoff if I were all alone with him at the North Pole!" Hannah turned to the messenger. "Where the hell did you get that piece of information?" yelled Hannah.

"Hey!" said the messenger. "Don't kill the messenger!"

"_I _believe you, Hannah!" said a guy in the audience.

"Me too!" said another guy. "A girl as sweet as you would _never _fall for a bad boy! I LOVE YOU!"

"You're my favorite pop star Hannah!" said a girl. "You would never betray us!"

"I believe you, Hannah!" said another girl. "And...I LOVE YOU TOO!"

"HANNAH'S A SLUT! HANNAH'S A SLUT!" chanted half the room.

"HANNAH DIDN'T DO IT! HANNAH DIDN'T DO IT!" chanted the other half of the room.

Hannah turned to her lovers, Bridget, and Gary. "Guys?" said Hannah helplessly.

"Hannah, of course _we _believe you" said Lola patting Hannah's bare shoulder.

"Yeah" said Mike putting his hand on Hannah's other shoulder.

"I believe you too!" said Bridget.

"Well, _I _don't!" said Gary as he walked off stage. Hannah scoffed.

Suddenly, Traci came on stage. She gave Hannah a stern look. "Traci," said Hannah. "I know this sounds bad, but-..."

"How could you, Hannah?" accused Traci. "With everything I know about you, everything you stand for! You would get jiggy with an asshole like K Rap Rodriguez?"

"But Traci!" said Hannah sounding emotional. "I _didn't!"_

"This party is for sweet, sensitive people who still like to enjoy life," stated Traci. "But apparently you just 'like to enjoy life.'"

"Traci," said Hannah. "You're talking crazy! You're acting like you don't want to be my friend anymore!" Traci touched her nose with her index finger. "So," said Hannah quietly. "You really don't believe me?" As many people that were in the room, there was a moment of silence. Traci glared at Hannah. "Bye," said Hannah quietly and emotionally. "I'm really going to miss you."

With that, Hannah left the stage and started walking out of the room. "Hannah, wait!" called Mike. Mike and Lola tried to follow Hannah, but it was no use. Just before Hannah exited the room, she stopped, and looked back at Traci, then she left the party.

Later that night, Hannah arrived home, and Robbie Ray was waiting for her on the couch. Robbie Ray approached Hannah. "Darlin'," said Robbie Ray. "I'm sorry about what happened to you at the party."

"You mean...?" said Hannah.

"Apparently the press can write purty' fast" said Robbie Ray. "I got an email for 'em. They told me every word you said, and I just wanna' let you know, I'm on yer' side." Hannah made a sad expression and she and Robbie Ray hugged. When the hug parted, their arms were still around each other. "If we all work together," said Robbie Ray. "We can try and beat this thang'." Hannah gave Robbie Ray an emotional nod, then they hugged again.

**Stay tuned for chapter 2: "Speaking to the Undead"**


	2. Speaking to the Undead

**Disclaimer: The document you are about to read is a parody. The writer of the document is not associated with Hannah Montana or Disney channel in any way. Little or none of the content of this fanfic is from any episode of the show. Also please note that none of the content of this fanfic reflects the opinions or views of any actual person portrayed herein. Anyway, IT'S JUST A FANTASY!**

** Chapter 2: "Speaking to the Undead"**

Miley was in her room, laying on her bed, feeling depressed. She had been getting a lot of mean, nasty calls and texts on her Hannah phone all day; all from a bunch of people who believed that awful rumor about her having sex with K Rap Rodriguez. She felt so unloved. Miley didn't know which was worse. Half her fans thinking she did terrible, horrible things, or losing her closest friend besides Lily and Oliver. Miley/Hannah had had some very good times with Traci. Despite not knowing her secret, Traci was the one who helped Hannah get used to stardom, and desensitized her so that she could act cool. Meeting other famous people was awesome, but it was so much more sentimental when she had Traci by her side. Not as much as Lola/Lily, but sentimental nonetheless. Whenever Hannah didn't have total access to everything, Traci helped her out with it. Miley _was_ upset about her fans, and Traci may have only been one person, but with the life she lived, sometimes the cheers of many just didn't add up to the friendship of one. She knew that more than any celebrity. Now that she probably lost half her fans, how would this effect her career? Would she still have people cheering her on? Would there be quite as many people at her concerts? Would anybody buy her products anymore? (OK, that last one was kind of shallow, but it hurt!). Miley wanted whoever started that rumor deported!

Just then, Miley's Hannah phone rang. "Oh no," complained Miley. "What are they going to say about me now?" Miley answered her phone. "Look," said Miley angrily. "If you're just going to bad mouth me, then why don't you just shove your cell phone up your-..."

"WHOA!" said the voice on the other line. "Hannah! Hannah! Calm down! It's me!" It was a young guy's voice.

"Who is this?" Miley asked.

"It's Gary Rithgow!" said the guy. "Look, I just wanted to say, I acted like a jerk last night, and, now that I think about it, I think you're a sweet, sensitive, loving girl who would never go for a guy like K Rap Rodriguez."

Miley put her hand over her heart and breathed a sigh of relief. "THERE IS A GOD!" shouted Miley with her face and hands pointed at the ceiling. "Thank you, Gary, I love you for this!"

"And, to make it up to you," said Gary. "I'd like to have dinner with you."

Miley hesitated. "Uh..." said Miley. "I don't know how to say this, Gary, but...I'm a little afraid to go out in public right now."

"Oh, don't worry," said Gary. "I rented us a private place!"

"Where's that?" asked Miley.

45 minutes later, Miley had gotten dressed up as Hannah Montana, and now she was in a room of an exotic hotel. She was having dinner with Gary Rithgow. There were pictures of fruit on the wallpaper, and there was a fountain with a provocative statue of a topless mermaid. "Thanks for giving me another chance, Hannah" said Gary.

"Actually, Gary," said Hannah. "This is more like _you _giving _me _another chance."

"Hey," said Gary. "Everyone deserves another chance. Say, um, I hope you're not offended by that statue over there."

"What statue?" asked Hannah. Gary pointed at the statue of the topless mermaid and Hannah looked at it. Little did Hannah know that while her back was turned, Gary slipped something into Hannah's drink. "That?" said Hannah when she turned back to Gary. "Oh no!" said Hannah happily. "I actually think it looks hot! I mean, I happen to be bisexual."

"Woooooooo!" cheered Gary. "I kind of figured you were! With the way you act with Lola Luftnangle and Traci Vanhorn on T.V."

Hannah took a sip of her drink, and suddenly, she had this sick feeling running down her throat. She started gagging. Hannah didn't know what was wrong with her, but then Gary gave her an evil smile. Hannah gasped for air as she looked at Gary with suspicion. Gary put his hand on the bottom of his neck, and started peeling off his face, revealing it to be a mask! The face underneath the mask was...K RAP RODRIGUEZ! He laughed and said "Looks like you gon' be knocked out cold, Hannah! So I get to play with yo' hot body all I want, bitch!"

Hannah was scared and suffocating! Within seconds, she was able to breathe just fine, but she was losing energy. K Rap Rodriguez was the last thing she saw before the world around her went blurry, and she fell unconscious. Hannah was unconscious, but not completely. She started having a dream sequence. There were a bunch of swirling colors around her, then some scary music started playing. It was Marilyn Manson's "The Beautiful People." Along with the music, Hannah started seeing frightening images in front of her. The first image she saw was an image of Lily and Jackson making out. After that, she saw three clones of Franklin, Jackson's dummy, wearing Hannah Montana wigs, lip singing the words to the song. Then she saw an image of Mikayla, flying on a broomstick, cackling. Next, she saw Amber and Ashley waving scissors in her face, making cutting motions. When that image faded, she saw "The Cracker", the physical female bully from middle school, stomping towards her. The Cracker punched her in 3 X instant replay. When The Cracker disappeared, she saw Mr. Corelli, wearing a medieval dress, a viking helmet, and a blond woman's wig with pigtails, holding a music score in front of him. Mr. Corelli sung a long, loud note in the form of opera. Then Mr. Corelli zoomed into Hannah and let out a scary howl as his eyes were swirling as if he were hypnotized. Finally, the scary song started to quiet down and fade. Hannah waved her hand in front of her to see if she could wake herself up, or act in some shape or form, but she couldn't. She heard some more tender music start to play, then saw an image of herself when she was 5 years old, hopping up and down in a white rabbit costume. The image of herself started doing a chant.

"_Dang flabbit!_

_Where's that rabbit?_

_He's got a habbit_

_Of runnin' away_

_Hey honey,_

_Where's that bunny?_

_He took mah' money,_

_That 'ain't OK_

_Hey hey, hey hey, bunay!_

Hannah knew she was dreaming, but little did she know that it was a dream _within _a dream. Because when she regained conciousnes, she was not Hannah, but Miley, and she was in bed, at home, at night. Whoa, of all the nightmares she had had so far, that one was the most true to life! Miley was freaked out by how real it was! So real, she almost thought maybe it was a _sign!_ But if so, what did it mean?Did it mean that K Rap Rodriguez himself was the one who started that rumor? Had he taken over her career? Was Hannah's celebrity status going to slip even more? Whatever it meant, whether it was a sign or not, IT SCARED HER! If there was one thing Miley hated more than horror based nightmares, it was nightmares about things she was going through in real life. Miley couldn't believe this. First there were ghosts in her house, and now this!

If what just happened was a dream, that meant all those mean, nasty phone calls and texts didn't really happen. Well, OK, maybe it wasn't _all _that bad.

The only thing Miley could do right now was try to get back to sleep, but she was afraid if she did that, she would start to hear that ghostly voice again. She had already heard it twice, and both in the same circumstance. It happened while she was in bed, in the middle of the night, and when she had just woken up from a nightmare. By now, these ghosts were starting to get predictable. The thing she didn't know was: When.

Miley layed awake in bed for a while, waiting for the voice. Nothing. She stayed awake for 15 minutes. To Miley's surprise, she heard something else. It was a deep rumbling noise. Miley shuddered with fear. At first, she thought it was the work of ghosts, but then the sound came again, and she knew what it was. Thunder. Miley shut her eyes. There was a third thunder boom, and it was followed by a flash of lightning. Miley trembled just above a whisper. Even with her eyes shut, the contrast between the darkness of her room and the brightness of the lightning really made her see it. 20 seconds went by, and there was another thunder boom and a flash of lightning. Miley trembled again. She thought for a moment, then suddenly, she started to feel like a big wuss. She honestly didn't know what she was so scared of. She lived in Los Angelas! It stormed every day in Los Angelas! Although, with what she had been going through lately, she couldn't help but be a little scared. Thunder and lightening with rain wasn't so bad, but thunder and lightening _without _rain was spooky! Miley just wished it would start to rain so it wouldn't be quite as scary.

To Miley's surprise, just as the thought occurred to her, it did start to rain. Miley could hear it, but not quite enough. With a little courage, she got out of bed, and opened her window. Miley listened to the sound of the rain fall into the ocean as she looked out the window. It was a little comforting, but she didn't smile. Once again, she wished she had Lily and Oliver with her. She would have been sure to snuggle with them very tightly. Miley would hold onto Oliver while Lily held onto her from behind, and they would just listen to the beautiful rain drops.

Listening to the rain was actually starting to make Miley thirsty. It took her even more courage to leave her room and walk into the bathroom. When she walked into the bathroom, she looked down to avoid looking in the mirror. Miley was always kind of afraid to look in the mirror at night, with the lights off, while everyone else was asleep. She always thought a ghost or something else may be looking right back at her. She took a paper cup, filled it with water, turned her back to the mirror, and drank it. She did this twice. After she threw the cup in the waste basket, she looked out the open window of the bathroom and listened to the rain. It was nice to hear the rain falling onto the many plants around her driveway.

Suddenly, Miley saw something unusual outside. Something illogical. Something that didn't make sense to see outside, at this hour, and during a storm. Miley lived in the crossed center of a T intersection, and what she saw was far down the street. Among the street lights, there was a shadowy, humanoid figure, walking towards her house, with it's arms stretched upwards, and fingers curved in a creepy form! Miley gasped as her heart started racing. She panicked for a moment, then before she knew what she was doing, she left the bathroom and into the hall, ran down the stairs, and through the living room all the way up to the front door. Miley locked the door, then did the same with the deck doors. After that, she pulled down all the shades on the windows and doors so no one could see inside the house. Finally, she ran back up the stairs, into her room, and jumped into bed and hid under the sheets. Miley hid under the sheets for 30 seconds. She slowly peaked out from under the sheets, then a loud clap of thunder came and she shrieked briefly and hid back under the sheets.

Miley stayed awake while panicking verbally for a while, waiting for the sound of someone trying to break into the house. It never came.

_**The Next Night...**_

It was 11:00 p.m. Everyone in the Stewart house was in bed, but Miley hadn't gotten to sleep yet. As Miley tried to sleep, a thought occurred to her. She forgot to do the dishes. In the Stewart house, Robbie Ray, Jackson, and Miley took turns doing the dishes every night. In the past, Jackson didn't always do this when it was his turn, and Robbie Ray really got on his case about it. Miley didn't want Robbie Ray to do the same with her, so as much as it scared her, Miley got out of bed, and exited her room. She entered the dark hallway. Not a very big room, but still kind of scary. Miley slowly walked down the dark stair case, holding onto the railing. The stairs were even darker this time, since this was at night. Slowly walking down, Miley couldn't see a damn thing. Spooky. She didn't start to get the slightest light until she was almost at the bottom, which was illuminating from the street light on the end of the driveway (and Miley's driveway was pretty long to begin with!). Miley reached the bottom and turned on the light switch at the bottom of the stairs. It didn't light up everything, so she turned on the lamp on the end table. Miley looked behind the end table to see if the lamp was plugged in. This time, it was. Oliver suggested that the loose plug she discovered before was the plug for the automatic light timer hooked up to the big lamp, which was five feet away from the small lamp. She couldn't quite remember, but Miley was pretty sure she also noticed that the outlet behind the end table was empty! Miley then turned on the big lamp.

As Miley walked into the kitchen, she remembered Oliver's reaction to her telling him about the mysterious voice she heard. "Gee, well, now _that I can't explain!"_ Those were Oliver's exact words. "Gee, well, now _that I can't explain!"_ Those words filled her heart with terror. Miley turned on the kitchen light and started washing the dishes. The flowing of the water created kind of a pretty sound, so it took away some of the fear Miley was feeling. Miley had seen a couple of horror movies where a slasher slaughtered a woman while she was taking a shower, which involved running water, but the way it sounded in the movies wasn't the way it sounded in real life. So, this was much better. Miley was scrubbing the dishes as peacefully as she could.

But then...something scary happened. The power went out! Miley shrieked quietly and briefly. The lights went out, and Miley heard the sound of the VCR clock going out. Unlike in horror movies, Miley had turned on the lights to try and make it less scary, but now, the darkness was _beyond her control!_ She was in the dark. Alone. Alone in the dark. Miley trembled for a while, waiting for another scary thing to happen. Nothing happened. Miley turned off the water in the sink. She realized she had to get a source of alternative lighting. Miley slowly walked towards the living room. She took one step, two steps, three steps, four steps, five steps, and OUCH! She stubbed her toe! It hurt in a way that it stunned her, so she didn't scream or groan. Miley made very quiet groveling noises as she fell on her butt, and clutched her bare foot in pain. She found herself trying to relieve the pain by sucking on her toes. Sucking her own toes gave her a brief memory of her sucking _Lily's _toes the first time they hooked up. It was a little comforting, and she made a dazed smile. It didn't last very long, though. Miley was still incredibly scared. She knew what it was she crashed into, and she felt kind of stupid not remembering exactly where it was. It was the desk between the kitchen table and the living room. Miley got up, and started moving towards the storage cabinet. She put her hands in front of her to try and feel her way around. Her hands finally hit something wooden, and she knew it was the cabinet. Miley opened the cabinet and pulled out a flashlight. She turned it on and walked back toward the sink. Miley layed the flashlight down on the counter, pointed at the sink.

Just as Miley was about to turn the water back on, she noticed something underneath the dishes in the sink. Miley made a look of dismay. She lifted the dishes up, and froze with fear. She wasn't sure, but she almost swore what she saw looked like...blood. Oh no...this was scary...where did that come from? It was like someone shoved their hand down the garbage disposal! Either that, or planted there by _ghosts!_ There was no logical explanation for this!

Or was there? Miley picked up the flashlight, turned around, and looked at the kitchen table. She hadn't eaten dinner with her family that night, because she was at a Hannah Montana concert (which was surprisingly packed). The table hadn't been cleared, and Miley took a look at the contents on the table. There was a bag of hot dog buns, a tray with a few tater tots, cheese wrappers, and...sure enough, a bottle of ketchup. One of the meals Miley's family had was bratwurst, served with tater tots covered in ketchup. Miley wiped her forehead and breathed a dire sigh of relief. Of course! It was just ketchup! Miley knew that! Yeah, there was a logical explanation!

But the terror wasn't over yet. Meanwhile, over in the back of the living room, something was...moving. It was a mouse. It had climbed onto the piano, all the way onto the edge of the bed of the piano. It walked all the way up to the stick that was holding up the piano's cover. The mouse's path was blocked, so it jumped off the piano onto the floor. As it jumped off the piano, it knocked down the stick, causing the piano's lid to _SLAM DOWN, _and sent a long, loud, haunting tune that echoed throughout the house!

Miley screamed bloody murder! After Miley screamed, she heard quick footsteps! She was half expecting for there to be a slasher in a scary costume running towards her in the dark, but instead, she saw a flashing light shining, and her dad's voice yell "WHAT'S GOIN' ON? WHAT WAS THAT NOISE? WHAT ARE YA' SCARED OF, BUD?" Sure enough, it was Robbie Ray swinging his light-up raccoon, Buster. Robbie Ray faced and pointed the raccoon at Miley.

Miley squinted in dismay with her teeth showing. "As if I wasn't scared enough already!" said Miley sarcastically.

Robbie Ray rolled his eyes. "So what happened?" asked Robbie Ray.

"That noise!" said Miley. "It scared the hell out of me! It sounded like...the piano!"

"That's funny," said Robbie Ray. "How come the lights don't work?"

"The power is out, dad" said Miley.

Suddenly, Jackson came running down the stairs and into the kitchen swinging a baseball bat. "WHERE IS HE?" yelled Jackson. "WHERE'S THE BURGLAR? I'LL GET 'IM!"

Miley frowned and started a slow clap. "_My hero!"_ said Miley sarcastically.

"Good night nurse nickel!" said Robbie Ray to Miley. "What are ya' doin' downstairs, bud?"

"I'm sorry, daddy," said Miley a little more sensitively. "I forgot to do the dishes. I was washing the dishes, then the power went out, so I had to get a flashlight, and then...the piano's lid must have fallen down!"

"Awww no," complained Robbie Ray looking towards the living room. "Somethin' tells me we got another mouse in the house. Idunno' how hard it's gonna' be to catch _this _one."

"Ooo!" said Miley. "I just thought of a perfect name for this mouse! 'Stephanie.'"

"_Man, _yer' sexist!" said Jackson. "How come we can't give it a guy's name for a change?"

Miley smiled. "OK," said Miley. "How about 'Jackson'?"

The next day, Miley and Lily were on the beach, sitting at a picnic table. Lily had an issue of Popstar magazine in front of her. "I still can't believe half my fans think I had sex with K Rap Rodriguez" complained Miley. "I'm not even in the same category as him! That's out of character for me!"

"Yeah!" said Lily. "I mean, your fans love you not just for how you look, but for who you are. K Rap Rodriguez fans would probably just look for a good place to stick their dics!"

"It's a good thing my concert last night was pretty packed," said Miley. "But how do I know what all of my fans truly think?"

"Well," said Lily. "I've read a bit of the latest issue of Popstar magazine, and it says 'The polls have started. Tell us what you think! Did Hannah Montana have sex with K Rap Rodriguez?' 64 percent say..." Lily's voice turned grim. "Yes" said Lily finishing her last sentence.

"OH COME ON!" complained Miley looking up at the sky. There was a brief pause "Well," said Miley sensitively. "_You_ believe me, don't you, Lily?"

Lily put her hands on Miley's shoulders. "Of course I believe you, Miley," said Lily gently. "You would never go for K Rap whatever-his-first-name-is. Besides, you and I are so close, you would _never _be able to have sex with someone else without me knowing about it."

Miley suddenly got a painful feeling in her stomach. She smiled squeamishly. "Yeah!" said Miley nervously. "We're...really close! We tell each other everything, don't we?"

"Come here, Miley" said Lily. With that, Miley and Lily hugged. With her face behind Lily's back, Miley made a very painful expression.

That night, at the Stewart house, everyone was in bed. Once again, Miley wasn't fast asleep yet. After trying to get to sleep for a while, Miley opened her eyes. She looked around the room. She thought for a moment, then found herself getting out of bed and going into the hall. Miley slowly walked down the dark stairs. She reached the bottom, and walked into the living room. Miley had no idea why she was down there or why she left the lights off, but she was somehow doing it out of a gut instinct. She walked into the kitchen. She walked over to the sink and turned on the little light just above the sink (which didn't light up the room very much). Miley looked out the window above the sink for a while. All she saw was darkness. It was too dark to even see the sidewalk, trees, or plants, so she was pretty much looking at nothing.

Suddenly, Miley looked to her left, and SCREAMED! There was writing on the wall! Text written in _BLOOD!_ This time, she was sure it really _was _blood! The bloody text read: **I know what you did 4 months ago.** There was _definitely _no logical explanation for this! Miley was about to run upstairs and tell Robbie Ray about this, but when she turned around, she screamed again!

Just beyond the kitchen table, there was...Lily. Lily didn't scream along with Miley. She just stared at her with a cold look. "Lily!" said Miley frightened. "What are you doing here at this hour? You should be in bed now! How did you get in here without anyone hearing you?"

"The question is," said Lily in a very cold hearted tone. "Why did you do it?" Uh oh. _Why did you do it?_ That made Miley start thinking about the bloody message. Miley's heart started racing faster than 12 galloping horses. "I am your long time BFF, and now girlfriend" said Lily. "But just who is...your _real _girlfriend?"

Miley hesitated in fear. As she looked at Lily, she noticed Lily had one hand behind her back. "Why, _you're _my real girlfriend, Lily!" said Miley still scared. "You're the only girlfriend I've ever had! It's you!"

"_Me _or _Ashley Tisdale?"_ said Lily accusingly. Miley shrieked briefly. There was a boom of thunder and a flash of lightening outside. "You had sex with another girl before me!" said Lily. "Now you must DIE!" With that, Lily took her hand out from behind her back and held up a MEAT CLEAVER! Which already had blood on it! There was a loud clap of thunder and a flash of lightening.

Miley screamed in terror as Lily lunged towards her and swung the meat cleaver. Lily missed. Lily chased Miley around and around the counter several times, then Lily tried to outfox Miley by going the other way, and they both looked at each other, trying to go the right way to catch or escape the other. Miley screamed again and ran into the living room and up the stairs. Lily swung the meat cleaver at Miley again on her way up the stairs, but missed. When she reached to top of the stairs, Miley ran into Robbie Ray's room to get his attention, so he could rescue her from her from her insane girlfriend! Miley jumped onto Robbie Ray's bed, but HE WASN'T THERE! "Aaaarrrggghhh!" snarled Lily aggresiveley as she jumped on the bed. Lily took another swing at Miley as Miley jumped off the bed, and Lily missed again. But then, Lily tackled Miley to the floor! Miley was trapped!

Lily turned Miley onto her back. "Lily!" screamed Miley. "You can't do this! This is insane! I'm your BFF! I'm your girlfriend! _I LOVE YOU!_ After everything we've been through?"

"Apparently that doesn't mean much to you anymore!" yelled Lily as she raised the meat cleaver above Miley's head.

"WAIT!" pleaded Miley. "What if I were to give you some of my Hannah Montana clothes?"

Lily froze. "Really?" said Lily calmly as she slowly lowered the meat cleaver. "Say, that's actually a very generous offer! EE!" said Lily blissfully. There was a boom of thunder. But then Lily's expression changed back. "But I'm far too upset to think about clothes right now!" said Lily hostily. "You broke my heart, and now you must pay!" Miley screamed as Lily swung the meat cleaver down at Miley's face!

The instant the meat cleaver hit Miley's face, Miley suddenly wasn't in her dad's room, she was in her own, and Lily was nowhere in sight. She was in bed. Miley sat up and was choking and coughing for a while. At the same time, her heart was still racing, and worst of all, she actually felt like there were ants crawling around inside her brain! Miley clutched her head in pain. It took her about three minutes for her to get over all of these symptoms.

GOOD GOD! That was the worst nightmare she had yet! Her best friend! Her girlfriend! Trying to kill her! She was better off with the four legged monster! What Lily said to Miley the previous day must have really gotten to her (that, combined with the ghosts in her house). "Besides, you and I are so close, you would _never _be able to have sex with someone else without me knowing about it." Those words were so tender, yet, they gave her nightmares. It wasn't that she liked Ashley Tisdale better, Miley/Hannah was just trying to have a little fun, so she acted on impulse. Plus, up to that day, Miley and Lily were straight! Neither of them ever had any idea that they would ever have feelings for the same sex. This guilt was driving Miley insane. She didn't know which was worse; having sex with another girl before Lily, or just _not telling _Lily. Right now, Miley was starting to wish it never happened. Well, OK, she wouldn't take back having sex with Jake Ryan, but Miley wished she never had sex with Ashley Tisdale.

She had kept this a secret for far too long. It was time to tell Lily the truth. Miley thought to herself "_YA' THINK?"_

The next day, Miley was on the beach, standing in the sand, eating a taco. So many horrible things had been going on lately. Believing in ghosts, the rumor about her having sex with K Rap Rodriguez, and the guilt about lying to Lily. Everything was wrong. With the way Miley was feeling, the taco she was eating was just about the closest thing to comfort she had.

Suddenly, Lily came up to her from behind and said "Hi, Miley!" Miley screamed briefly and dropped her taco in the sand. Miley looked over her shoulder. "What? What?" said Lily in a concerned, panicky tone. "It's me! Lily! Your girlfriend! What are you so scared of?"

Miley breathed a sigh of relief and turned around. "I'm sorry, Lily," said Miley half tearful. "But those ghosts in my house are really going to my head." And that wasn't a lie. The things Miley was going through in her personal life weren't the only things she blamed for her nightmares. With the idea that her house was haunted, she also blamed the ghosts.

"_Hoh..."_ said Lily sensitively as she mad the sad puppy face. "You know Miley, I don't care whether I believe you or not, I hate to see you suffering like this." Miley frowned with a sad expression. Lily put her arm around Miley. "Come on," said Lily with a comforting smile. "Let's go sit down and we'll talk about it."

Miley and Lily went over to a picnic table and sat down. There was a moment of silence between them. "Lily..." said Miley.

"Yeah?" said Lily.

"There's something I need to tell you..." said Miley. "And I'm not sure how you're going to feel about it."

"Well, come on," said Lily. "You already told me you believe in ghosts, so how bad can this be?"

"I don't know," said Miley. "It might be bad."

"Well, come on, Miley!" said Lily reassuringly as she put her hand on Miley's. "I'm your girlfriend! You can tell me anything!"

Miley took a deep breath. "Lily..." said Miley. "I..."

"Hey, Miley!" interrupted Oliver as he just arrived on the scene. "I've got a great idea on what we can do about your ghost problem!"

Miley looked up at the sky, with her teeth clenched and eyebrows slanted, and waved her hands with her palms pointed up. "I'm sorry, Oliver," said Miley. "What did you say?"

"I said," said Oliver. "I know what we can do about the ghosts in your house!"

Miley gave Oliver a fat lip frown. "What's that? Call the Ghostbusters?" said Miley sarcastically.

"The only way to keep a ghost from haunting you," stated Oliver. "Is to..._understand _the ghost."

"How?" said Miley growing impatient.

"By..." stated Oliver. "_Communicating _with it."

Miley was lost. "Well, gee, how am I going to do that?" said Miley in a smart ass tone. "Being haunted by a ghost is like...being a celebrity! Which I am. They know your name, but you don't know theirs. And when you have ghosts in your house, they can see you, but you can't see them!"

There was a brief pause. "Miley," said Oliver. "It takes some kind of psychic to communicate with ghosts. I know someone who isn't exactly psychic, but he acts kind of crazy, so he's pretty close."

"Who?" asked Miley.

Oliver held his index finger up. "It just so happens," stated Oliver. "That, Mr. Corelli _also _believes in ghosts!"

"AH!" Lily exclaimed in a high pitched tone. "Oh my god! At his age?" said Lily in a ridiculing tone.

"Seriously!" said Oliver. "He's told me a couple of stories about encountering unexplained phenomenon and messing with the unknown!"

"Well," said Lily. "That explains a lot, because I always kind of thought he _was _the unknown!"

"Uh, no, Lily," said Miley. "You're thinking of Jackson's room!"

"Come on, Miley," said Oliver. "If you're really desperate, why don't you give him a chance?" Miley frowned angrily and rested her chin on her hand.

Miley agreed to have Mr. Corelli come to her house to try to "communicate with the ghosts." (even though she thought it was a stupid idea) One thing Miley had to do was make sure neither Robbie Ray, nor Jackson knew about this, so she had to schedule this on a day that Robbie Ray and Jackson weren't home. The next night, Robbie Ray and Jackson were gone, and Miley answered the door in her living room. Lily and Oliver were there, but she didn't see Mr. Corelli. "Where's Mr. Corelli?" asked Miley.

"Don't worry," said Oliver. "He's right behind us, he's coming."

"Hope you don't think it's too awkward having a teacher come to your house" said Lily.

Just then, Mr. Corelli came up from behind Lily and Oliver. He was wearing a psychic turban and a mystical robe. "I _knew _you lived here!" said Mr. Corelli.

"It's a little awkward already" said Miley.

Everyone else came into the house. "OK," said Mr. Corelli. "The fist thing I need to do is..." Mr. Corelli suddenly reached under his robe and pulled out a crystal ball! "Whip out my crystal ball!" said Mr. Corelli finishing his last sentence.

Lily and Oliver's eyes widened. "How did you do that?" said Lily surprised. "Are you a magician too?"

"Uh, no," said Mr. Corelli. "I've been holding it under my robe the whole car ride. Didn't you notice?" Oliver and Lily were dumbfounded. "Next," said Mr. Corelli. "We need to place the crystal ball on the table" said Mr. Corelli placing the crystal ball on the kitchen table. "Like so."

"Hmm, thanks," said Miley sarcastically. "I didn't know how to do that."

"Now," said Mr. Corelli. "We light some candles." Mr. Corelli reached under his robe and pulled out two candles that were in holders!

Lily and Oliver's eyes widened partially. "Let me guess," said Oliver. "You've been holding those under your robe the whole car ride?"

"No," said Mr. Corelli. "Actually," Mr. Corelli opened up half his robe. "I've got this _industrial size pocket!"_

Mr. Corelli placed the candles on the table as Miley, Lily, and Oliver sat down at the table. Mr. Corelli pulled a box of matches out of his pants pocket that said "Lucky Duck" on it, with a picture of a duck. "SAY!" said Lily. "Those are the same kind of matches Abby Jensen used for her birthday wishes in the movie '16 Wishes'!"

"Really?" said Mr. Corelli. "Because I'm more than just a psychic! I can also be a genie!" Mr. Corelli crossed his arms. "Your wish is my command!" he said facing Miley.

"O-kay," said Miley. "I wish to be rid of the ghosts in my house!"

Mr. Corelli shrugged and nodded with his head sideways as if he were to say "Fair enough." With that, he lit the candles. "And we're going to have to shut off the lights" said Mr. Corelli. Mr. Corelli shut off the kitchen light, then when he went to shut off the living room lights, suddenly, all the nearby lights shut off by themselves! Everyone screamed. "Looks like the ghosts...are a step ahead of us!" said Mr. Corelli frightened.

"_Miley...what just happened?"_ said Lily in a frightened, accusatory voice.

"I _told _you, Lily!" said Miley frightened as well. "My house is haunted!"

"No...oh no," said Lily. "It can't _really _be haunted!"

Mr. Corelli sat down at the table. "We'd better get on with this before the ghosts _really _start to haunt us" said Mr. Corelli. "We now must join hands." Everyone at the table held hands in the form of a circle. There was a moment of silence.

"Now what?" asked Miley.

"We must close our eyes," said Mr. Corelli. "And I will speak to the ghosts." Everyone closed their eyes. There was a brief moment of silence. "Oh mighty spirit or spirits of the Stewart house," said Mr. Corelli slowly. "We have reason to believe you exist. The only occupant of this house who notices you, Miley, has been experiencing out of the ordinary events. She is very terrified, and she fears for her life. We need some answers. So please, tell us who you are, and why you are here."

Mr. Corelli then started muttering indistinctly. He was doing it very quietly and quickly, and no one could make out what he was saying. "What are you doing?" asked Oliver opening his eyes.

Mr. Corelli opened his eyes and looked at Oliver. "I'm picking up the ghost's answering machine" said Mr. Corelli.

Miley opened her eyes and gave Mr. Corelli a disgusted look. "Sweet niblets!" said Miley. "Mr. Corelli, I respect you as a teacher, but right now, how am I supposed to take you seriously?"

Suddenly, the candles on the table went out! This was followed by a noise that sounded like some kind of weird, loud, echoing drum! Everyone screamed. After about four seconds, the candles re-ignited by themselves! Everyone stared at the candles in fear. When the candles came back on, Lily and Oliver were hugging each other. "How's that for serious?" said Mr. Corelli with his eyes widened. There was a moment of silence. "Let's join hands again" said Mr. Corelli. Everyone joined hands again and closed their eyes. "Ghost or ghosts of the Stewart house," said Mr. Corelli. "You have demonstrated your presence."

"_Ya' think?"_ interrupted Miley.

"We are now in dire need of answers to our problems" said Mr. Corelli. "We ask that you reveal your identity. We ask you give us an explanation. Who are you? Why are you here? Why have you been haunting Miley? Why have you been haunting Miley and no one else in the house? What are your intentions? What are your beliefs? Describe your feelings. Tell us, and perhaps we can reach a compromise."

Suddenly, Mr. Corelli's crystal ball started to _glow!_ It was glowing green, and made a loud energy noise! Then, a picture started to form on it. There were black globs sloshing and contorting all around it in many different shapes and sizes while the crystal ball made loud sounds similar to wind blowing! This time, ironically, everyone except Miley screamed. Miley looked offended. After the crystal ball stopped all of it's animation, glowing, and noises, Miley yelled "Mr. Corelli, is this your idea of some kind of joke?"

"I'm not doing it!" said Mr. Corelli. "Honest!"

"You think this doesn't make sense?" said Miley. "There's a logical explanation for this! You want to hear about unexplained phenomenon? Think about all the things that happen at my house when you guys aren't here! This crystal ball is obviously electronic!"

"Miley," said Mr. Corelli in fear. "That's impossible! There aren't any buttons or switches on it!"

"Yeah right!" said Miley picking up the crystal ball. "I'll bet there's a button or switch on here somewhere!" Miley then started aggressively examining the crystal ball. But she couldn't find any buttons, switches, or any other evidence of it being electronic! "You know what?" said Miley without losing her composure. "I'll bet it's got a motion sensor!"

Still frightened and sharing a hug with Lily, Oliver said "_Miley, _you just moved your hands all over it and it didn't activate!"

"Oh come on!" said Miley. Miley turned to Mr. Corelli. "This is nothing but a high tech crystal ball, that you got at one of those Halloween stores!"

Suddenly, the crystal ball, still in Miley's hands, started glowing again. This time, there was a picture of a female zombie on it! The zombie said "_Miley! Miley! Miley!"_ This phased Miley briefly. Still holding onto Oliver in fear, Lily said "No, something he got at the store wouldn't do _that!"_

The crystal ball stopped animating. Miley looked at Mr. Corelli. "How do I know there isn't some kind of recording device?" accused Miley. "How do I know you didn't put that on there?"

"Um, Miley..." said Mr. Corelli in panic. "The crystal ball just called you out. I...never planned...on you accusing me of playing a joke on you!"

Miley's eyes widened, then she looked at the crystal ball. A picture of a skeleton with glowing eyes appeared on it, which snapped at her with it's teeth twice. Miley screamed and dropped the crystal ball on the table. Everyone screamed as the crystal ball started making a whole bunch of swirly lights and scary, loud noises for about 12 seconds. After that, suddenly it stopped. Everyone stopped screaming as there was a brief moment of silence. Then, to everyone's surprise, the lights came back on! "WOO!" everyone exclaimed in shock. "What happened?" asked Miley calming down.

"I guess...the scary part is over" said Mr. Corelli.

"Well, yeah, but..._now _what do we do?" said Miley. "The ghosts didn't tell us anything! All they did was say my name three times!"

Mr. Corelli thought for a moment. "I guess the only thing we can do is try again" said Mr. Corelli. With that, Mr. Corelli turned all the lights off (and this time the ghosts didn't beat him to it), and they all did the seance over again. But there was no response. They tried it again, and this time Mr. Corelli chanted a few mystical words he read in an arcane book. But there was still no response. After a while, Mr. Corelli gave up. "Well, Miley," said Mr. Corelli. "I don't know what to tell you. The ghosts are ignoring us now."

"_Then what do I do?" _said Miley half tearful.

"I'll have to do a little research," said Mr. Corelli. "And then I'll come back later and see what I can do. And I may or may not have time to do the research, with all the papers I need to grade and students I have to deal with."

"What do I do until then?" asked Miley.

Mr. Corelli reached into his robe pocket and pulled out a wall decoration with suction cups on it. "Here," he said. "This is called a shadow repeller. In Africa, people believe this, temporarily, drives away evil spirits."

"_Temporarily?"_ said Miley groveling. "How long is that?"

"Oh, about..." said Mr. Corelli. "Two weeks. Just, hang it in your room." Mr. Corelli handed Miley the "artifact" and walked towards the door. "Until then, I'll see you at school."

Mr. Corelli left the house. There was a moment of silence. "So," said Oliver quietly. "Looks like we'll have to try it again some other time."

"Yeah," said Lily quietly. "Until then, I guess we'll be on our way." With that, Lily and Oliver headed for the door.

"NO! STOP!" pleaded Miley. "Please don't leave me all alone here with the ghosts!" said Miley fully tearful.

Lily and Oliver stopped, and turned around as emotion suddenly started to build in the room. They walked up to Miley with sad expressions and both gave Miley a tender hug at the same time. "OK, Miley muffin," said Oliver gently. "We'll stay. We'll spend the night." Oliver gave Miley a kiss on the cheek.

"Yeah," said Lily sadly. "If anything scary happens, we'll all be in it together. And by the way..." Miley looked into Lily's eyes. "I am _so sorry _I didn't believe you" said Lily. Miley made a pouty expression and hugged Lily tightly as a sign of pure forgiveness. Before too long, they were all holding each other tightly.

Miley loved Lily and Oliver, and she needed them now more than ever. She just hoped they would be with her until she got to the bottom of this nightmarish occurance.

The next night, there was a Hannah Montana concert going on in Hollywood. Hannah was singing one of the songs she once sang in Tennessee.

_You can change your hair and you can change your clothes_

_You can change your mind, that's just the way it goes_

_You can say goodbye and you can say hello_

_But you'll always find your way back home_

_You can change your style and you can change your jeans_

_You can learn to fly and you can chase your dreams_

_You can laugh and cry, but everybody knows_

_That you'll always find your way back home_

When the concert was over, Hannah was in a different part of the studio, signing autographs for the fans. Hannah finished singing and autograph for the 13th fan. "Thank you!" said the guy she singed for.

Hannah turned to the crowd. "I'm sorry," said Hannah. "But I can't give you _all _autographs." The other fans groaned.

"But you'd better give all of _us _an _explanation!" _said a familiar voice. Hannah looked in the direction of the voice and saw MTV's Hillary Burton, followed by a bunch of other young people. They came up to Hannah. "Hi, Hannah," said Hillary. "I'm Hillary Burton, and I'm with a bunch of former Hannah Montana fans who are very upset about you having sex with K Rap Rodriguez. They need some answers. So, my first question is, why did you have sex with K Rap Rodriguez?"

Hannah scoffed. "Simple! I didn't!" said Hannah.

"A likely story" said Hillary. "How do you explain being seen walking out of a hotel room with him?"

"Look," said Hannah. "I don't know who that guy at the party heard that from, but it never happened!"

"Please tell us how you met-..." said Hillary.

Before Hillary could finish, Hannah covered her ears. "Lalalalalalalala!" sang Hannah as she quickly walked away.

"Get her!" yelled one of the angry fans. Within seconds, the angry fans and Hillary Burton were chasing Hannah through the studio. Hannah ran for her dignity as fast as she could. Hannah was used to being chased by a bunch of people, but not people who were upset at her!

Hannah rounded the next corner, and saw Roxy standing just outside her dressing room. Hannah ran up to Roxy and put her hands on Roxy's arms. "Oh, Roxy!" panicked Hannah. "Am I glad to see you!"

"Go on and get in your dressing room and I'll hold 'em off!" said Roxy. Hannah quickly entered her dressing room. Outside her dressing room, the fans made a big wall to try to push Roxy out of the way, and Roxy tried to push them back with all her might. In the process, she accidentally pressed her hands into Hillary Burton's boobs!

"Hey!" yelled Hillary. Hillary raised her microphone as if she were about to beat Roxy over the head with it, then Roxy gave her a nasty look.

"You really wanna' go there?" threatened Roxy. Hillary lowered her microphone in fear.

In Hannah's dressing room, Hannah was huffing and puffing a bit. When she caught her breath, she walked around the room helplessly. This was terrible. She was now being attacked by angry fans (angry _former_ fans!) who were about to make her job a lot harder. People still believed the rumor that she had sex with that asshole. She kept denying it, but they wouldn't listen to her! Hannah was losing her fans, and she had already lost a friend. "How am I going to get out of here?" said Hannah out loud. Hannah looked around the room. She saw a window that she knew she could squeeze out of. But then she had second thoughts. "No," said Hannah. "What good will that do? I can't just run forever, I've got to face them some time." Hannah gathered her thoughts. She honestly thought people would be saying mean, nasty things to her for what she did at Traci's last party, but instead, they were trash talking her for something else (something she didn't even do!). Did 64 % of her fans really think she would have sex with someone who went against everything she believed in? Why? She had read in the latest issue of Bop magazine that people were saying "Everyone has a dirty side." That was very true, but to Hannah, and everyone else she deemed lovable, there was a difference between dirty and mean. In a sense, Hannah didn't believe in having sex with someone just because she liked the way they looked. She had wanted to do that at one time or another, but if she had any idea that that person was "evil", she would never do it. K Rap Rodriguez didn't deserve a hot, sexy girl like her. Not as a girlfriend, not as a conquest. Hannah was into sensitive guys (and girls).

Hannah walked into the bathroom of her dressing room. She looked at herself in the mirror. She was so pretty, yet, with the way people were treating her, she somehow didn't like what she saw. Hannah turned on the sink and started washing her face. She also washed her forehead, and in the process, she accidentally knocked off her wig, and it fell into the sink! Revealing her as Miley! Miley quickly reached to turn off the water, but when she did that, she accidentally knocked a bottle of some kind of purple liquid into the sink, spilling it all over her Hannah wig! "NO!" screamed Miley as she turned off the water. "No! No!" Her Hannah wig was wet, and now, part of it was _purple!_

Miley tried to wash out the purple, but to her dismay, it didn't come off! "NOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Miley. She walked back out of the bathroom, listening to all the screaming and pounding on the door outside her dressing room. She was trapped. Trapped like a rat. Her fans were mad at her, and now, if she left her dressing room, they would find out that she was really Miley Stewart! Before, Miley honestly didn't think things could get any worse, but now, they had. This was the end. The end of her career, and her normal life. Miley just wished some one would come along and get her out of this.

Just as the thought occurred to Miley, suddenly...she heard a voice. A voice that seemed to come from inside her dressing room. _"Miley"_ said the voice. Miley gasped. _"Miley, can you hear me? I'm here" _said the voice. It was the same voice she heard before in the middle of the night!

Miley looked around the room in fear. "Who are you?" called Miley loudly. "_What _are you? _WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?_ I have just about had it with all these scary mind games! _Show yourself!"_

Suddenly, Miley received the shock of her life. Right in front of her, she saw...A TRANSPARENT IMAGE OF HER _MOM!_ Miley screamed long and loud! "Now now, Miley" said the image gently. "There's no need to frightened. I'm your mamma! I would never do anythang' to hurt you."

"_Mom?_" said Miley in fear. "No! It can't be! It can't be you! You can't be here! You're _dead!"_

"I'm a ghost, darlin'" said the image still gently. "And I've come back to save you."

"_Save _me or _haunt _me?" said Miley still scared. Miley couldn't believe this. She started believing in ghosts a week ago, and now she actually _saw _a ghost right before her very eyes! She was _talking _to a ghost! And not just _any _ghost, the ghost of her dead mom!

"Well, gee," said the ghost of Mrs. Stewart. "When ya' say the word 'haunt', ya' make it sound so bad." There was a very brief pause. "Miley," said Mrs. Stewart. "I can see yer' in a lotta' trouble right now. Yer' at the end of yer' rope, and you jus' don't know what to do. Ya' know what the biggest thang' about it is?"

"What?" said Miley still frightened.

"Since I'm from beyond the grave, I knew it was gonna' happen. So I wanted ta' do somethin' about it. Ya' know that mysterious voice you heard in the middle of the night?" Miley just trembled. "That was me" said Mrs. Stewart. "I tried to warn you about this, sweet pea, butcha' didn't answer!"

"I'm sorry mamma!" said Miley tearfully. "I was scared!"

"Welllll," said Mrs. Stewart tenderly. "That's only natural." 

"Why did you make all those scary things happen around my house?" cried Miley.

"I'm afraid those are just things that happen in the presence of ghosts, dumplin'," said Mrs. Stewart. "Good or evil. When I spoke to you, this was what I meant when I said you were in danger and that you had to be ready." There was a brief pause.

"So..." said Miley in tears. "It was you all along! You came back from the dead to _help _me!"

"Uh huh" said Mrs. Stewart. "This is one of yer' biggest challenges in life, and I knew you couldn't do it alone. Daddy doesn't know what ta' do, so I had ta' come along. See? Even now that I've died, I'm still lookin' out for you."

"I miss you, mommy!" cried Miley.

"I miss you too, sponge cake" said Mrs. Stewart.

"Mom," said Miley. "If I hug you right now, will I go through you?"

Mrs. Stewart opened her arms. "Not if I hug you back" said Mrs. Stewart. "Ghosts can act upon people or objects if they choose to." With that, Miley and her ghostly mom shared a warm, tight, tender, loving hug. That was another thing Miley missed, her mom's hugs; and now, she didn't have to just think about her. She was really there.

"But what do I do, mamma?" said Miley tearfully after the hug parted. "How do I get out of this?"

"_Miley," _said Mrs. Stewart in a reasoning tone. "You may think you can't handle this, but just look at all that's happened! Look at how far you've come! You're in a Hollywood dressin' room, for god's sake! Half yer' fans may be purty' upset at you now, but they've loved you for such a long time! You've attained so much fame and popularity. You've been meetin' famous people who love you too. You had sex with Jake Ryan and Ashley Tisdale! _Safe _sex! And that's only _one _improvement of yer' love life. You got through to daddy about bein' over protective of you, and now he's givin' you more freedom. Yer' two long time friends, Oliver and Lily, are now yer' boyfriend and girlfriend! Ya' had safe sex with them too! Plus, you've made friends with Joanie Pulumbo and Lisa Bower! Jus' ta' think Joanie is a girl you and Lily used to hate! Makin' friends with former enemies? Now that's a _real _accomplishment! If you can do all that, then I'll betcha' by god you can do this. Miley, there's always gonna' be one time in yer' life or another, that there's somethin' you think you can't handle. All ya' gotta' do is...think about everythang' you've done so far."

"Wow," cried Miley. "It's so good to know you can see me now. And you're _really here _now! It's almost like you're alive!" There was a brief pause as Mrs. Stewart gave Miley a warm smile. "But mamma," said Miley. "My fans and those reporters won't listen to me! I keep denying that rumor, but they don't believe me! They just keep going on and on about it!"

"Miley," said Mrs. Stewart. "All ya' have to do is say what's in your heart. You were capable of handling this on your own all along, I jus' needed to remind you. I think maybe they'll listen to you now."

Miley gave her mom a tearful smile. "I love you, mama" said Miley. They shared one more hug.

"I love you too, sweet pea" said Mrs. Stewart.

"But what about my wig?" said Miley. "It's all wet and died purple!"

Mrs. Stewart smiled. "There's one more thang' I've done for you" said Mrs. Stewart.

"What?" asked Miley.

Mrs. Stewart gestured towards a dresser in the room. "Look in the top drawer of that dresser" said Mrs. Stewart.

Miley walked over to the dresser, opened the top drawer, and pulled out another Hannah Montana wig! Miley gasped. "Thank you, mom!" said Miley. "You've really saved me!"

"Have a nice life, sweet pea!" said Mrs. Stewart. With that, she waved goodbye, and the ghost of Mrs. Stewart started to vanish.

"Goodbye, mom!" yelled Miley after her mom vanished. "I'll never forget you!" Miley put her hand over her heart with a look of passion for a moment. She put on the backup Hannah wig, thus becoming Hannah again. Hannah took a deep breath. It was time to face those angry fans and reporters. Hannah remembered what the ghost of her mom said "All ya' have to do is say what's in your heart."

She walked towards the door and opened it. All the people started making a big fuss over her coming out. Roxy desperately tried to keep them back. "OK people!" yelled Hannah. "Stop the pushing, shoving, screaming, and yelling!" Everyone started to calm down. "Roxy, you may step aside" said Hannah. Roxy stepped aside.

Hannah noticed there was also a camera man nearby. Hillary Burton came up to Hannah with her microphone. "OK, Hannah," said Hillary. "Don't run away this time. I want the inside story on how you met and slept with K Rap Rodriguez."

Hillary stuck the microphone in Hannah's face. "First of all," said Hannah. "Those tabloid writers are trash, and secondly, Hillary, why are you always so obsessed with other people's private lives? Don't you have a life of your own?"

"Woooooooo..." said everyone else offendedly.

"Uh, Hannah," said Hillary not losing her cool. "This isn't about me, this is about you."

"Oh yeah!" said Hannah sarcastically. "Whatever keeps people from finding out about your _vibrator!"_

All the fans started yelling at Hannah in anger. The yelling subsided after about seven seconds. "Hannah," said Hillary. "What is with you? You're acting like Avril Lavigne!"

"Yes," said Hannah. "And I would appreciate it if you wouldn't _advertise _her in _my documentary!"_ This time, the fans cheered! "Avril Lavigne is a bitch" said Hannah. "She's not in the same category as me" said Hannah more assertively. "She goes against everything I believe in, just like K Rap Rodriguez." Hannah turned to her fans. "If you really are my fans," said Hannah. "You know me well enough to know that I would _never _even get anywhere _near _a celebrity like that. Not on purpose, at least. Rodriguez's music is very mean and cold hearted. My general purpose in life is to be sweet and tender, and to tare down anyone who gets in the way of it. At one time or another, I have wanted to have sex with some one just because I like the way they look, but if I have any idea that that person is mean, I would never want to. So...that is why...the rumor...is false."

Suddenly, along came a voice from the other side of the hallway. "PA-YOW!" said the voice. "Gather round like field mice and roll out the red carpet, 'cuz' the big boss man is here!" Everyone was surprised to see that it was none other than K RAP RODRIGUEZ HIMSELF!

"BOOOOOOOOOO!" said the former Hannah fans.

"_Listan'"_said Rodriguez to the former Hannah fans. "You got two choices, you can eitha' eat shit, or praise the dog here for shovin' his rocket right inta' the docking bay of Hannah Montana!"

"EEEEEEWWWWWW!" said the former Hannah fans.

"K Rap Rodriguez!" said Hillary Burton surprised. "What are you doing at a Hannah Montana concert?"

"I say!" said Rodriguez. "I came by to see mah' former lover!" said Rodriguez as he gave Hannah the eye. "But lemme' tell you," said Rodriguez turning back to Hillary. "I'm also inta' hot, brunette reporters!"

Hillary laughed nervously. "Um," said Hillary. "With all do respect, there's a time and place for everything, but I'm mainly here to interview Hannah Montana. I'm asking her for the story on how she and you hooked up, and she denies it ever happened."

K Rap Rodriguez turned to Hannah. "Whatsamatta', Hannah?" said Rodriguez. "You don't rememba'? How many people do you sleep with anyway?"

"Close your eyes, and maybe I'll remember" said Hannah flirtatiously.

"WHAT?" the fans exclaimed. K Rap Rodriguez closed his eyes and puckered up his lips. Hannah held her index finger up to her fans as if she were to say "Wait for it." Hannah snatched a soda away from one of the fans, pulled off the lid, and poured it on K Rap Rodriguez's head! The fans cheered Hannah!

"_What?" _complained Rodriguez. "You didn't like the way I sucked your tits?"

"Suck on _this!" _said Hannah. With that, she gave Rodriguez the finger. The fans cheered as K Rap Rodriguez left the area.

"HANNAH! HANNAH! HANNAH! HANNAH! HANNAH! HANNAH!" the fans cheered in redemption.

Hannah then started singing into Hillary Burton's microphone.

_Your a true-hue-hue-hue friend_

_Your here 'till the end_

_You pull me aside when somethin' 'aint' right_

_Comfort me now and into the night_

_No need to pretend,_

In the next part, Hillary sang along with Hannah.

_A true-hue-hue-hue friend_

_Your here 'till the end_

_You pull me aside when somethin' 'aint' right_

_Comfort me now and into the night_

_'Till it's all right again_

_Your true friend_

_Your true-hue friend_

_Your true friend_

At this moment, that was what Robbie Ray was watching on t.v. with Miley. "Way to go, bud," said Robbie Ray with a smile. "I knew you could handle it."

"I know," said Miley politely with smile. "And you're not the only person who told me I could." Suddenly, a sound emitted from Miley's Hannah phone. "Ooo!" said Miley. "I got a text." Miley took out her Hannah phone, flipped it up, and gasped happily. "IT'S FROM TRACI!" Miley exclaimed. Miley pressed a button and read the message out loud. "'Sorry I ever doubted you, Hannah'" Miley read. "'Can you forgive me?' _Yes!"_ Miley texted Traci back "Of course I forgive you, I want to see you again."

"It's just so good that everythang' is back to normal" said Robbie Ray.

"Yeah," said Miley. With that, Miley and Robbie Ray hugged. As they hugged, Miley looked out the window above the kitchen sink, and saw the ghost of her mom one last time, smiling and waving goodbye. Miley winked at her. Her mom winked back, then disappeared. Miley honestly didn't think she would ever see her mom again, but she did. She knew one day she would reunite with her mom, but for the time being...it was time for her to take chances, and find her own wings.

**The End**

**Coming soon: Hannah Montana "Mike Stan Lee the Last"**


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